Mediation of individtalfatioii umd psychological differentiation
Faralle! to and perhaps in contrast to the mediation of sharing, it is no less important to build in a human being a feeling of individualization, of his being a separate entity, with the rights to think and to express himself in a special way in conformity with his personality, that is distinct from that of others. What appears to be something and its opposite- sharing as against individualization, do not contradict but complement the human being, who is at one and the same time belongs and a partner, an individual, separate and distinct Actually, today a person has to be activated by two of these components together, that is to say-to be himself and as such to be a partner?? to his fellow. A teacher who knows how to mediate the two components, enables his pupils to express themselves and their positions and does not impose his own on them. But unfortunately this is not a rare case. In general, the learner is compelled to make his style and attitudes correspond to those of the teacher, in order to be acceptable to hint.
The need for individualization and psychological differentiation is not observed in equal measure in every culture and not even in every family. It is influenced more than any other component, by the demands of society. For example, the hig differences that can be found among cultures in relation to terms of dependence and independence among males and females, arise from; the different roles which each society assigns to each sex.
In western culture, the need for individualization and psychological differentiation is particularly stressed. But it derives from the absence of mediational interaction that pushes children into a premature independence situation, more than from an suction directed and supported by a mediator.
Individualization and psychological differentiation can be developed by means of a process of mediation, preceded by and accompanied by mediation of sharing behavior and emotional involvement? and mediation of meaning? and of transcendence and intentionality and reciprocity, which are the basis of the mediated interaction- In this way, feelings of rejection and abandonment can be avoided? children whose confidence level is fortified through a process of mediation, display a far better ability to perceive themselves as separate and independent entities possessing emotional ties that continue way and above the parting?? separation anchored in space and time. On the other hand, children who have not been fortified by means of a mediational interaction, react in panic to separation from the home, since it is difficult for them to imagine themselves as living without the physical presence of the parents. The mediatee's awareness of the legitimacy of the differences of opinions, of tendencies, of desires ands styles, without necessarily accepting them, represents an essential condition for a proper individuation process. Mediation for looking for differences between individuals?/ leads to the formation of a distinct self-perception in relation to the other person??. On the other hand, the simulated/? individuation created as a result of an enforced physical separation, does not lead to true psychological differentiation. In many cases it constitutes the basis for the development of an extremely egoistic and egocentric personality which does not identify its boundaries, and thus does not perceive itself as a distinct and independent entity.
The baby, in its first days, does not differentiate between it and the mother. The moment it begins to recognize the separateness between them (in a process of individuation and differentiation) there begins a process of estrangement?/ which is, in fact, its development process as a human entity. As Buber says, in order for there to be relations, there has to be distance. And the greater the distance, so the deeper the relationship.